Dec 17, 2007

What Was My Brother Thinking?

Last night, I had a dinner date with my brother’s friend (the one who salted my driveway last week). We went to an nice Italian restaurant in town. Had the most delicious chicken Tuscany pizza.

When he asked if nice jeans and a shirt was OK for the restaurant, I agreed thinking he would be wearing a nicer shirt than he did. The fringed leather jacket really threw me for a loop. He did offer his arm when we walked to the restaurant from the car.

After dinner, we sat at my house talking about various things. Mostly about his ex-wife’s mental issues, how much work his house needed (in detail) and how he wasn’t sure he wanted to put money into it (think unfinished drywall, leaky roof, etc.), and work. Did I mention he’s only dated one woman for a couple months since his divorce 3 years ago?

Another thing that bothered me is that he walked on my living room carpet with his boots, after I had said I just shampooed it. Most men would’ve taken a clue to take their shoes off, after they saw me take my shoes off before walking through my house.

He’s nice an all, but I don’t feel he’s on the same level as me on lots of issues. He’d be a good guy to have as a friend, but I can’t see a future there.

Quite honestly, I don’t know how my brother would think that we were compatible. How does one delicately handle a situation like this?


Kathryn said...

Now HERE is where you just say, "No". You are dating. There is no commitment. You are not compatible, so the next time he asks you out, it's "You are a nice guy, but you are not for me." If he pushes, just tell him you are seeing someone else (which you are). It's actually a blessing to decide this right away rather than dither about it for months.

As for your brother(s). It is obvious that they don't respect you. No wonder they would set you up with a less educated, less clueful guy. They probably see you as desperate, which you are not. You are having little problem meeting nice, interesting men. Tell your brothers that they don't have a clue about manners, education, or skills, so they can keep their lowlife friends to themselves from now on. Just because they are family doesn't mean that they really know you at all.