Apr 29, 2008

Jeff's Way of Handling A Wife

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Jeff. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Susie.

Since I retired several years ago, it has become necessary for Susie to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.

Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't ha ve to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Susie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older.

However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it w as well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

Sincerely, Jeff


EDITOR'S NOTE:
Jeff died suddenly on March 1 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a sledge hammer laying nearby.

His wife Susie was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Jeff somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.

13 comments:

Velda said...

LMAO!!!! HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Tammy said...

That is hilarious! I love it!

Natasha said...

Thank you for the comment about my Dogs.

This is hilarious!!! I was laughing my head off. I do have to show this to my DH.Not that he is anyway like this man,but it will remind never to be LOL..
Natasha

Kendra said...

LOL! The whole time I was reading this, I was building up the urge to reach through the computer and do something bad to Jeff...thankfully Susie took good care of him by the end.

Lisa said...

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ha!

Robyn in Oz said...

Reading your entry today 'made my day'. If only all instances had such a happy ending!

Chiloe said...

Loved it of course !!!

Carol R said...

Susie couldn't have put Jeff's golf club away in a better place - after all if he was complaining about an untidy house ... wonder where the number 5 iron went to??

Made my day Meari - thanks for the laugh

Anonymous said...

Meari,
That was too funny! Thanks, I needed a good laugh.

Jenna said...

I had read this before, some time ago, but it still cracks me up. Thanks for the smile!

Anonymous said...

:grin:

There are some days, there really are...

Nancy M said...

Reminds me, DH needs to put new grips on my clubs!!! LOL

Anonymous said...

LLLOlll, that last line was almost too much :-)